Thursday, October 1, 2009


Another one of The Five Love Languages is physical touch. We spoke on Quality Time…engaging in uninterrupted, distraction free time together. We’ve talked about Words of Affirmation, the love language of a person who responds to verbal compliments, encouragement and verbal reaffirming. Now a person whose primary love language is physical touch would much rather have you hold them and be silent than offer any advice.

Now let’s get to the juicy part…the touching, hugging, kissing, rubbing, caressing, holding, massaging…well you get the point. Learn what type of touch your partner likes it makes a difference. Per Gary Chapman, the author of The Five Love Languages, “it is important to remember that this love language is different for everyone. What type of touch makes you feel secure is not necessarily what will make your partner happy. It is important to learn each other’s dialects. That way you can make the most of your hugging, kissing, and other physical contacts.”

Here are 10 suggestions for showing physical touch:
1. Hold hands when walking from the car to the door of the store.
2. Riding in the car reach over and touch your spouse on the arm, stomach, thigh, or run your fingers through their hair.
3. While eating together let your knee or foot drift over and touch your spouse under the table.
4. Walk over and hug your spouse and tell them they are the greatest and rub their back and tell them how much you love them.
5. While your spouse is seated walk over and initiate an unannounced shoulder massage.
6. While sitting together in church and the pastor calls for prayer, reach over and hold your spouses hand.
7. Meet them at the door when they come home, or meet them at the car, or at the street and greet them with a hug and walk in the house together.
8. Run the water in the Jacuzzi or tub and announce to your spouse you are looking for your partner to join you.
9. Initiate sex by starting with a foot massage and then work your way all the way up!
10. When family or friends are present touch your spouse in front of them, hold their hand, give them a kiss on the check, or put your arm around them this will earn you double emotional points, as it says even when all these people are around I still see you.

1 comment:

Mrs. A said...

Great post! My girlfriend and I tried to get the book at our local library and all the copies were GONE! So it must be pretty popular. We are the list, so hopefully the book will come in soon and we can read and discuss with our husbands.

I think that touching is very important in a marriage otherwise you are just going through the motions and can become more like room mates. I like some of your suggestions too!